281. The Concept Of Self-Preservation
This is a topic which is near and dear to my heart. But I suppose… not in a good way.
I’ve personally struggled with self preservation, however there’s somewhat of an irony to this. Our “self” is always preserved, so long as we are alive. In fact, we’re more so ourself when we continue to evolve, adapt and change. But, typically self preservation is related to preserving oneself in the state that they are, whether it be good or bad. Most times when we’re in this construction, we’re not really seeing the bigger picture. We may think we’are at our peak, but it’s likely that we’re not. We’re likely either holding onto the past, or inhabiting negative energy.
There are lots of reasons as to why someone may want to self preserve. Typically fear is one of them. The cruel irony is that often times the universe will put us through a time of upheaval when we do have to change, but this makes us want to stick our heels in the mud even more. It’s a frustrating, and often times complicated process. When we feel we’re self preserving, we may be in a fight or flight or survival instinct. Going through traumatic situations may make us feel like our only sense of comfort is retaining the present moment, and in the now. We can see this when other people are memorialized in a point and place in time, particularly if they leave or die tragically. We can’t really wrap our mind around a change or evolution being better than the current moment, so we freeze ourself. But as the world moves outside of our window, we just freeze ourself in a point and place in time that will never occur again. We do ourself a disservice, because we ultimately disconnect ourselves from our surroundings. We fail to be a part of the human race.
Is there any value in self preservation? I do believe that during these times, yes. If we’re preventing ourselves from going into a psychotic break, or pushing ourselves so far out of our comfort zone, we may not easily be able to come back from, self preservation may be the only option or answer. In some ways, self preservation makes us take a long, hard look at ourselves and the outside world. Ironically, this may come after a period of disconnect, so that we can reconnect with ourselves and our surroundings before moving onto the next chapter of our lives. So it may not even immediately come after a period of negative experiences or trauma.
Self preservation can look like a lot of things. It can be physical, mental or emotional. Physically, we may keep things, people, etc. which are no longer serving us. This starts to look and add up like clutter. And we can do the same things with our thoughts and emotions. We pile on lots of energetic weight, and we cannot or refuse to let go. We may ultimately feel slow, tired, lethargic, or have subsequent health issues. It really just “ties us down” in the present moment. But like I mentioned, it may have been needed.
The last paragraph describes some symptoms of being in a self preservation era. Depending on how long you’ve been in it, it may be difficult to discern if you are or not, as you may have limited perception of what your life can and will be beyond this period of time. But if you feel like things are slow, stagnant, heavy, etc., this could be a good indicator that you’re in a period of self preservation or stagnancy.
My best advice is to use this period wisely. This may be inevitable, and a way for the universe to tell you to slow down. Again, connect with yourself and your surroundings. Try to intellectualize why you’re in this space and what you need to do to fulfill this time wisely and move through it. It’s important to “move on” accordingly, and not overstay your welcome, to avoid clashing timelines and feelings or depression.
The most important thing to note is that you are perfect, complete and whole without self preservation. It can be incredibly overwhelming and almost even traumatic to think of yourself in a whole new life, on a whole new timeline. It’s essentially… death and rebirth. And these are some of the scariest things that we can go through and face as humans. But your soul is inevitable, and it will live on. The experience may only sting for a moment, but it’s part of the natural cycle of life, and you’ve likely done it millions of times.
